Story of life

Under-utilized end to life 

There are times when we get forgotten by people and we end up rotting till we die ( Do we remember Parveen Bobby).

Meaningful end to life

The above picture is that of a person who has used his/her talents till the end and there remains memories as sweet after-taste in everyone's life.

#instamumbai Bandra

Pipe Dreams of life- Always end in the junkyard

The third eye is checking you out!

Mumbai: Don't waste FSI on these things

If I had a dollar for every time I took a ....

Looking for love?

Nerdy Love

(Please do not try to read the text of the book and now don't look at it again to catch some words) 

Dark Love

Cliche Love

Expressions

1. First Attempt: How You Doin'

2. Reality Check

3. Second Attempt: How You Doin' 

4. Come have a seat

5. I know you love this couch

6. At it

7. Just did it

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Following are random clicks, with no story

Victory Dance :)

The visionary: Main Yaha Bridge Banaunga

First dump after a week's constipation

Na na bhaiye, aap chutiye hai!!

The Other Side

For the first time, I am on the other side of the lens of the camera

Searching hope

Begging pardon

This one I dedicate to the recent rape victims and their families which find themselves alone at the time of utmost need. The dead leaves the world but the crying ones are only her family members.

Mourning

Addiction

I:
The first swag
on the eighteenth birthday
Little tipsy
But felt better than okay

Then came the boasts
I'm a man now!

Next being dragged
To the nearby shady bar
Aao lagaye do teen peg
Kare aankhein do dooni chaar

It became a hobby
We wanted to do it everywhere
In the park
On the roof
In the car
On the couch
Is jagah me to feel hai bhai
Soon it became dull
Been there, done that
What's next?

II:
The first drag
In a goa hotel
Choked and coughed
But it felt real swell

Soon dragged between breaks
To the next cig shop
Have it with a chai
Everytime your head pops

Wanted to do it everywhere...
In the park
On the roof
In the car
On the couch
Feel to hai bhai
Been there, done that...
What's next?

III:
The first tender touch
Shook me to the core
Cant keep my hands off you now
Did you bolt the door?

Steal a moment
Every now and then
Standing in a crowd
But away from all friends

Wanted to do it everywhere...
In the park
On the roof
In the car
On the couch
Feel to hai .. madam

Been there, done that...
What's next?

Burn down your money

coz it aint gonna buy you these:

1. On my way back to Pilani from Delhi, my bus broke down and in order to reach college, I had no other option but to hitch hike.
Ticket Rs. 200
Cold drink Rs. 30
Chana Rs. 10
Two girls hitch hiking in a car with two uncles drinking beer on Haryana highway, PRICELESS.

2. In Pilani, I thought I fell in love and hence tried once to flee from college to meet my guy who was in Delhi.
Auto Rs. 20
Phone bill Rs. 200
Bus ticket Rs. 200
Getting down from the bus after being convinced for one hour by friends and actually getting convinced by a friend's bf (How!), PRICELESS.

3. Right after I started dating this guy in MDI, we thought we wanted some space away from friends and we went to Paharganj in Delhi (you know!)
Metro Rs. 20
Auto Rs. 260
Room rent Rs. 700
Ending up sitting in The Lalit, having a 4-hour long conversation over a cup of coffee on super luxurious couch and falling in love, PRICELESS.

4. During internship, my friends and I decided to go out to a club to dance.
Entry to club Rs. 1500
Drinks Rs. 500
Instead of Blue Frog eating in a road side dhaba, cheap. (Gotcha, something's come at a price!!!)

The First Time

Way back in the 6th standard, I discovered by accident that the pee hole had another purpose. I was hell scared. I didn't know what was going to happen to me, was I dying? Because white was always a deathly colour.

But then I found there's something called Playboy, and that WWF diva Sable is on the latest cover. In the days of text only internet, having managed to get access to an connection with multimedia.. after a lot of money wasted spent well, I arrived on Playboys website. And I swear, it was Para.. Para.. Paradise!

I downloaded galleries, made a playmate collection sorted by year (yes, I've been a collector too), took prinouts of my fav pics only to burn them after their existence was consummated. I locked main door, and blamed it on my bro every time I was caught. So much effort, so much lying, all for sex.

Cuz sex was taboo. It was my discovery that the world doesn't approve. Porn was a secret club accessible only to a privileged few. And I knew that the day I lost my virginity, would be the best day of my life.

And then, many years later, it happened.. Mazaak mazaak me, my virginity was lost.

I was on the top of the world! It was a eureka moment. My existence was now justified. I was gonna be a sex god, girls would be driven by lust at the first sight. The porn industry would give me a PPO, only I would reject the offer for a more idyllic life.

But did that feeling last? So much talking, flirting, touching, cuddling, protection, music, candles, turning another person on/off like a switch, long foreplays.. Uff.. Things were so much simpler as a child. Now I get it when people say they wish they hadn't grown up.

Love

If you have been loyal enough to be regularly following this blog and were wondering why the previous few days there was no post, the reason is that both the authors were busy together. Chi-chi the dirty heads. 

Anyway when I first meet this guy in my college, I din't fall in love. I just found him interesting and before I knew it, I was in love. This is exactly what happens when you reach this land of beautiful rains, romantic sunsets and busy schedules. For those who haven't understood yet, I am talking about BOMBAY.

I went there for a six month training and in the first two months, I abused the crowded locals and auto walas infinite times. But it was always interesting to see how the road side vendors still opened their shops in the heavy downpour and weren't complaining more than the MNC employees. Slowly, I understood the life of Mumbaikars and I fell in love with the city (and yeah, people too!). 

Mumbai lets you explore yourself. It's a city for one, couple, family and group. It accommodates poor, lower /upper middle class, rich and filthy rich. It is for introverts and extroverts. It as something for art lovers, nature lovers, businessmen and traders. In short, you get my point; it has something for everyone. The city serves everyone with love and rush. 

The part that I love the most - people. They are busy. If you are in Mumbai and you're days are getting busier, then you have started belonging. Mumbaikars don't stare at what you wearing as long as you are wearing something. They don't give you disgusted looks if they find you kissing in an auto. They don't gossip. They don't show off. They are busy and they are subtle. 

My recommendation is for all those who have never stayed enough in Bombay, don't hate it because to love it you need hot blood and a rush of feelings and its not your fault that the city hasn't attracted you enough coz its not for everyone. Not everyone can be a Mumbaikar.

P.S. - There are some things that words can't describe and we explain them as 'love'.

Smoking Kills

Of course it does. So what? Everything kills. What doesn't kill?

Your bills kill your savings. To pay these, you get a job and that kills your personal life.

Playing football kills people because there's the dark side of hooliganism attached to it.

Aeroplanes kill people in crashes. They create mortal fear in the mind of people, which is pretty bad too.

Swimming kills people by drowning them.

Love killed Romeo and Juliet, sex kills the innocence of a relationship, giving way to jealousy and possession.

I put the question to Janghu who asks 'Do dildos also kill?' Of course they do. Picture this- a guy who thinks his wife is so much in love with his dick that she doesn't want anything else in life, walks into his bedroom to see she's.. You can imagine the rest. He dies of a heart attack. Possible?

Even something as innocent as childrens toys kill by poisoning.

Religions kill people- more than anything else if you think abt it.

So why single out smoking?

Naach Na Jaane, Aangan Tedha

In India, we have classical dances, we have folk (which is semi-classical) and we have western (the fancy jazz, salsa, hip-hop etc etc). But if you really want to see what Indians love to do, you got to watch a few Bollywood movies. They make half their revenues from selling albums and item numbers. 

But even that has evolved over time. Mithun Da's disco dance has changed into Sheila ki Jawani. I only wonder if this change has been for better or worse. One thing is for sure though and that is that the craze to dance and showcase it has widened.

If you are still reading this post, I have some surprise for you. I don't plan to bore you further but give some weird, interesting and funny facts about dancing:

Important Fact - Dancers are disciplined and focused and turn out to be successful students and hard workers (this is for those who know that I dance).

Healthy Fact - Social dancing is equivalent to a four mile walk.

Funny Fact - During the Great Depression, dance contest marathons were a common way for people to earn some extra cash by winning the prize money. Two dancers named Mike Ritof and Edith Boudreaux  have been heard to have danced for 214 days straight during that time.

Useless Fact - The "Mexican Hat Dance" is the official dance of Mexico.

 

Crazy Fact - In 1518, hundreds of people started dancing together in "Dancing Plague". Over a course of a month, around 400 people were dancing on the streets of Strasbourg. Many died of exhaustion and heart attack. Local physicians believed that it was a natural disease caused by hot blood and the cure was more exertion. Hence, a wooden stage was setup to encourage people to dance it out. 

Legal Fact - In 1925, a law was created in California that makes it illegal to wiggle while dancing.

Interesting Fact - You don't have to be able to walk to be able to dance.

Gay Fact - Same sex ballroom dancing has become popular in Australia and New Zealand.

Factual Fact - While dancing, body releases a chemical called endorphins, which is responsible for positive moods. This chemical also acts as a painkiller.

Well, if you are still there, I got to say "Thank you!"

The Cribbing Buddha

So we are at an age when we're not religious but spiritual. Rebellious atheism was for adolescence.

Obviously you have thought if religion was a choice and not an inheritance, which one would I have chosen? If you haven't, think about it for a minute.

Unless you are the kind that says I'll choose the religion that supports polygamy or promises n number of virgins in heaven, your first thought would have gone to Buddhism. (Ok, I agree Osho is pretty awesome too ;)
But face it, the firangs there won't lay you any hay- 'tumhe ghaas nahi dalenge' & anyway it's not a religion.)

But then why Buddhism?
Maybe cuz lot of famous, awesome people endorse it- Steve Jobs, Brad Pitt, Sharon Stone, Tiger Woods.
Plus it's a very open religion, doesn't tell you to do much except meditate. That brings a lot of mysticism to it.
It's like this cool dude of all religions. By it's awesomeness or its coolness, don't know which, Buddhism definitely has a pull.

Do I like Buddhism? That's a different story. But I'll tell my experience with it.
So this is 3 years back, Mumbai monsoons, story of 3 friends. Getting bored, not much to do as all were jobless or going to start b-school. Catching up at night for a smoke, saying 'Kuch toofani karte hai'.

Pandeyji says his dad goes to a 10 day meditation camp not far from Mumbai. The rules are:

1. No electronic devices, smoking oR drinking (very sensible)

2. No reading or exercising (Hmmm.. Ok)

3. Meditating 12 hrs daily (uh.. Huh)

4. No talking to anyone, total maun vrat (R u serious?)

But still, Pandeyji, the salesman that he is, convinces an unwilling Dhanno and me that we all should go.

And when the day comes, Pandeyji, the motherfucker, disappears.

So it's just me and Dhanno, and we go only because we don't wanna chicken out. To our delight, there are other things Pandeyji didn't mention

5. If you get caught talking, you are reprimanded like a school kid.

6. You'll be woken up by a temple bell every day at 430 am. (If you don't wake up, a helper will come to your room, you know, to help you wake up)

7. Last meal of the day is at 6pm, and you get Poha every day. (I mean, every fucking day)

8. No shagging (Wtf!!?? Kill me!)

But obviously, rule 8 is not enforceable, so Dhanno and I both discovered that by day 3 we were both shagging thrice a day, and obviously we had broken rule 4 also. Dhanno had gone to the extent of requesting his neighbour to lock him inside so that the helpers don't bother him while he snores to glory. (I used to sleep in my own pagoda cell like a good boy cuz my neighbour was a fanatic)

But then it was a great experience in retrospect. We have a lot of things to remember, without technology and gossip. And everything taught about religion, we both will take to our graves.

My First HeartBreak

To most of my friends, it happened when we were around 12 years old. No, no I am not talking about puberty (#ReadtheTitle). But I was way ahead of my friends when it comes to a heartbreak.

My family and I were travelling to Chandigarh with my uncle and his family. On our journey back, the train got delayed and we were kinda stuck at the Chandigarh railway station. We were pacing up and down the station having realllyyy nothing to do. If you have been to any Indian railway station you would be aware of the most amazing WEIGHING machines there. They look like some video games and attract every kid. Well, kids we were back then. So, we all wanted to get up on that. One by one, we all carried our Re. 1 coins and took our turns. Everyone came back with a slip that read their body weight and were showcasing it to everyone.

You must have guessed by now where I am heading. I got onto that machine excited. But it dint last too long. My heart started pounding like it was trying to come out of my body (#heartbreak). I hated that machine immediately and still hate it.

@all - If you have gone through this and feel under-confident, then you should know that being plump means being voluptuous ;) and you just need to know your sensuality.

#BeautyIsToAppreciate

Un-break my heart!

The best songs, the best movies, and the best stories come out of heartbreak. And for a reason..

It comes all of a sudden, and leaves a gaping hole in your life. Especially the first heartbreak. No respite there.

"The opposite of love is not hate, it's apathy."

I can see that in the way she talks to me now.

This is my story..

Every thing was so perfect! We were happily in love. We were the most important for each other. The love never faded for me, and she should have let me know that it did for her. I would have!

The promises, the pacts, none of those matter any more. I feel so stupid, holding on to all those memories that she doesn't. If she did, she won't have let this happen.

Now every time I call her, she takes her own time to reply, leaving me feeling ignored. And when she does, its a luke warm reply. Where I first thought things would be the same again, I see no hope now- she doesn't want things to be the same.

So I can't even ask her why. I can't ask her why she played those games, built all those memories, when they didn't matter to her.

She moved on before I did, and that's why it hurts the most.
Since my stupid younger brother came into her life, me and my mom were never the same again.

PS: Sorry! :P

PS2: I'm a younger brother.. so the above story is fictional :D

PS3: I love Wonder years, its a story about growing up. About first love, family, school, adolescence. I've been heartbroken at times, but after a point the love just fades away, and so do the feelings- till the next time. It's a much better way to grow up than learning it from others or seeing it on screen. As they say - 'Sau sonar ki, ek Lohar ki'- One powerful blow is better than a 100. (Pardon the pun)

Pics Bus Journey

We Live Together

Mumbai's Lifeline

- A lifeline is a last resort, only used to survive, when no other option remains.

Odd, Strange and Weird

Coins, stamps, comic books, paintings. What do they all have in common? Well, if you couldn't get that one, then you should get yourselves a hobby. Human beings love collecting things they find amusing and what I think is universally amusing is MONEY (no one gets tired of collecting, #UncleScrooge).

Do you remember the famous TV sitcom starring Elizabeth Montgomery, Bewitched in which the character Aunt Clara collected door knobs. In that case, CID's Daya should collect doors ;).

If you still haven't figured it, let me blurt it out to you. I am going to tell you about the most craziest collections people own. We will keep the best and my favorite for the last.

People have blogged about collecting pain, joy and injuries besides regular coins and stamps. The famous and sexy Britney Spears collects antique dolls. Wow, looks like someone's got fantasies. The hottie Depp, Johnny collects pigeon skeletons. I wonder which country's national bird is pigeon. On the other hand, Tom Hanks collects typewriters. Well, who had thought he'd be Lost in Translation? If you folks believe that Angelina Jolie can cut through your heart, you aint too far. After all, she had a collection of antique knives when she divorced Billy Bob. Before moving on from celebrities, let me warn them. Hey famous guys, not-so-celebrated-people collect your hair too. Yes, one of the top 6 weirdest items collected by people is celebrity hair.

If you think that's eew, my dear friends you haven't seen enough. There exists an Air Sickness Bag Virtual Museum. This catalogs more than 2,000 photos of air sickness bags from all over the world. Apparently Virgin Atlantic airlines in 2004 started a "Design for Chunks" project asking artists to submit their ideas for limited edition barf bags. Still not puking? Texas artist Barney Stinson Smith makes his art on toilet seats and already has created over 700 lids.

I am sure by now you must be wondering if I collect something. Yes, I have my own collection of stamps and coins. I know, I know, its boring! I do have a growing collection of shoes. Ofcourse it cannot match Imelda Marcos' 1,060 pairs of shoes unless someone else is willing to finance it.

But as you see the items that are collected vary from shitty stuff like navel fluff to exquisite paintings or works of a particular author. So the next thing you put your eyes on, start collecting!

Oh, I almost forgot. The most interesting and my favorite is the collection of beer bottle cap by the not-so-famous yet highly talented ME. Ofcourse, its a very HIGH level collection as it grows.

#Ilovemyself
#Beerrocks

Of colours

We all know that humans are a racist lot. There's no doubt about it. But do you see how serious the problem is?

Think about this: All very famous or very pretty superheroes wear either red or blue- Superman, spiderman, Captain America, even fucking  Shaktimaan and Chacha Chaudhari with his red turban.

The only other superhero-like colour is green- TMNT, Green Lantern, Hulk. See a pattern? These superheroes are either not so famous or really really ugly!

What message are we subconsciously feeding our future generations?

I'm not saying red and blue should be struck out and replaced by green for better equity and for the earth's future.

But that we have fixed notions about every thing. Red is the colour of action, of red roses, of love, of power. Blue is the colour of imagination, of tranquillity, of calm composure, of independence.

Green, though is an ugly duckling. It is gooey, flubbery material oozing out of radioactive stuff. It is the colour of sickness and decay. (It's also seen as green signal lights and environment, but then these things are not sensational enough, definitely not your first thought when you think green. That has to be ugly.)

We are a very biased race. Theyr just colours!

Ps: I love green. Half my shirts are green. But yesterday found that people who like green are cautious and not likely to trust others :D

I recently wanted to buy new shirts, and my girl convinced me to get a red and a maroon shirt. Both I love, so I might become more passionate and aggressive soon. But fck, I feel manipulated!

If all the roads were rivers

When Harpreet a.k.a. Gilli gave me this topic, my first reaction was "huh" and second "global warming". I still don't know to what extend I can stretch my creativity and come up with a competitive blog post. But then topics like these are like b-school case studies, i.e. there is no right answer.

When roads and rivers are paired up, they imply the means of transport. But when they are used comparatively, there my friend comes the perspective.

Roads to me mean stiff and limited. Stiffness comes from the way they lead us on. You cannot take a turn unless there is a road to it (Not talking about the kachha sadak Indians are used to taking). Limitations come from the way they restrict us from moving on to "The road less traveled". Roads can hence, imply the rigid perspectives that limit you from the world of creativity, discovery and growth.

On the other hand, rivers let you flow. It sounds very artistic to say but if you try to read it again, you'd understand what I am trying to explain. Rivers see no boundary. They see no defined path. They flow where they find space. They lead you to paths undiscovered. Perspectives that are not bound by pre-conceived notions lead into the new world of progress.

Thus, if we had no bounded perspectives, you would expect the world to be advanced, not just in social behaviour but also technology. But it is the balance between the two that makes it a world to live in. Free minds often are careless ones. It is the stiffness of the parents that keeps children from rebelling against the social system. It is the limited perspectives that motivate others to open to creativity.

P.S. - If you are a less philosophical person, then having no roads and only rivers would mean longer and expensive journeys and ofcourse super sexy cruises in India.

Theories- Of life, the universe and everything

“I’m like my mother, I stereotype.. It’s faster”
- George Clooney, Up in the Air

We all live by our ideas about the things we own, about the world around us, about people, and most of all, about ourselves. These are all theories and get manifested as stereotypes, judgments, love, hate, every action has many layers of theories applied.

Love:
My love is pristine. I think he’s the one.

You watched porn!? OH MY GOD!!

First comes interest-there’s talking, getting to know each other, and becoming more and more curious. Then flirting, touching, sensuousness and then wild, hot sexuality. That’s not sustainable though, so it dies down a little and a gap appears where you don’t know how to take it forward. If that phase passes, though, acceptance, trust and respect and then mature love follow.

Self:

I don’t litter- I throw all plastic in the dustbin. 

Cigarette buds can be thrown on the ground though- they’re biodegradable.

I am righteous. I’m ethical. I can’t do anyone harm. I am just, and a good person, people love me. Yet sometimes we can’t help but hate ourselves. Sometimes we can be a little hypocritical, or feel weak and give in to things we never thought we would.  

God:

I didn’t get what I wanted, there is no god.

Bhagwaan, please same shehar me rakh dena, aapko salary ke 5% ki bhent chadhaunga

My parents tell me daily to adopt religion. Yet they agree that when they grew up, first came indifference as a child, atheism as an adolescent, agnosticism when they were in their prime, qualified acceptance when they became adults and finally, blind devotion when they became old.

People:

She’s looking at me. She's nice. I think she has a crush on me.

Next day she’s looking at someone else- bitch!

First impressions don’t last forever! You come closer to a person you see as a hardhead, and they look more sensitive than you first thought. You come closer to a nice person and you see they have their own problems. People change their theories, their attitudes change, their behavior changes, and others theories of them change. 

Theories of science, of nature, of anything- are just that- theories, not fact. A single event can change a theory or make it invalid. A theory that is valid today may be completely false tomorrow. We can’t be disappointed if our theory doesn’t always fit. Change is the only constant. We need to embrace it with an open heart!

Walk...Oops! Do in the park

When you see a park, what is the first and the last thing you think of? Well, when I was asked this question I had to admit two truths of life. 1. The last thing that comes to my mind is exercising in the park. 2. Being a girl does not mean, I don't have fantasies.

It was during my summer breaks that I had decided to get some fresh air and hence started to go to the nearby park. As any other park, it was boring and dull. I came back frustrated and then next day wasn't the same. I met this super hot guy. He happened to be a neighbor that I hadn't noticed before. We spoke to each other for hours before I returned home happy. Soon we grew fonder of each other and started meeting outside the park too. We went to cafe, restaurants and shopping together a couple of times. The folks who have been to Kota might doubt the existence of cafe in Kota, but guys revisit if you haven't in a long time. Continuing, it turned out we shared same tastes in music and everything.

One day, we stayed in the park till it was empty. We had started with the usual talk about music and college and were involved in discussing the hottest topic - Love marriage vs. arrange marriage. Suddenly his eyes started locking with mine and his breath became heavier. He looked a little unnerved. He moved a bit closer. I ignored and before I knew we were discussing about sex and virginity. I was drifting away from this topic as I felt a little uncomfortable but then he moved right next to me and kept his hand on my right thigh.

He bent a little over me and asked, "What fantasies do you have?" I was perplexed by that question and couldn't really think. My heart skipped a beat and I started feeling weak. It took me around a minute before I gained my strength back and said, "What do you mean?" He asked me not to fool around and come straight to answering him. Lust is difficult to hide. He could see how much I was affected by his presence and at this proximity, I was turned on and yearned AT LEAST a kiss. I said, "I am very fond of open air and". Before I could finish, he got up and said, "That's it" and left.

Till date, I have no idea what went wrong but this is to inform all the hot guys of my neighborhood that it is still a fantasy.

P.S. - "Upar likhi kahani ke saare paatra kalpanik he (except me ofc). Actually poori kahani hi kalpanik he."

The Elder Fantasy

I was given a choice between ‘Elder Girl Fantasy’ and ‘Goan Fantasy’.

I choose the first, cuz it is very close to my dick heart.

No, seriously. Its a sweet fantasy, not a horny one.

In college, we always find people a few years elder mystical, as if a lot has happened in their lives. They are nicer, in the primes of their lives, smart, and have arrived in their careers. They have seen college relationships, and corporate relationships, and all of that is fresh in their minds. They have lived the life of turmoil and bootstrapping, but now they have money to spend and are settling down, but theres some turmoil left still. Their world view is sometimes cold, but usually objectively positive, exuberant and reassuring. Infinite Possibilities.

Yet because of the extra growing up, my ideal girl is detached in matters of love. She has seen it all and thinks that love is an eyewash. But somewhere in her heart she craves being young again, free again. To love wildly, carelessly, foolishly. 

For me, the pull was less responsibility, so I could be careless and free. (She’ll spend on me and take me to nice places :P)

My first elder girl(still fantasizing), was MK. God, she was a tota! She looked amazing in corporate suits, indian dresses, jeans, whatever, really. And she had short but straight, flowing hair that was always tied up neatly. And wore these super sexy librarian style glasses whenever she came back from office. Other times, she wore lenses.

She lived a floor below and I could look into her room. I would come back from college by 6PM and she’d be back by 7.30. Right at 7.30PM, I would switch off my room’s lights and start peeping thru the grill, shamelessly. She would enter her room and close her curtain in a single sweep, never caring to check if it was fully closed. Usually it wasn’t.

A little back here and a glimpse of navel there, and my day was made!

But one day I came back at 3.30 in the afternoon and she came back just a few minutes after me. I was standing at my window in a ganji, something I always do after I’m back, especially on a hot hot afternoon,  when everyone is asleep. She started changing in her room, and for the first time, caught me looking. She was putting on a T-shirt, but stopped midway, and slowed it down so it lasted thrice as long, her eyes still fixated on mine. Our eyes lingered on each others for a while. She finished putting on the tee, flicked her hair out with a jhatka, as if threatening me. Next moment, she stormed out of her room and I got a call on my landline. Tring tring… I pick up.. An aunty says.. Beta, Mumma ghar pe hai? I say haanji, hain.. She says. This is MK calling. Come downstairs immediately, u fucker, or I’ll come upstairs and fix this with your mom directly.’

Obviously, I have to go down! As I reach her floor, I see that the door is already open. I enter and it closes as soon as I’m in. She has her back to the door, leaning against it, hands crossed, eyes staring point blank at me and asks 

MK: ‘How often do you do that?’

‘First time, Miss’.

MK: ‘Ek laped maarungi, sachi bata’

‘Almost daily.’

MK: ‘Hmmm.. Have a seat.’

I sit. Her eyes haven’t moved a millimeter.

MK:‘You want something to drink?’

‘No, Thanks. I’m sorry, won’t ever do that again- I swear.’

She ignores my apology.

MK:‘What do you see every day’

‘Mostly I just peep in to see what you upto- you’re either reading or sitting on your laptop.’

She makes the laped maarungi action again, eyes still fixed.

‘I see you change every night through a crack in the curtain.’

MK: ‘And what do you do after that?’

I smile sheepishly.

MK: ‘What the fuck do you do after that?’

I grin sheepishly, arch me eyebrows innocently and do the fapping action in a very subtle way.

She grunts disgustingly. Then sits down on the couch opposite me, takes her eyes off me, looks outside the balcony and says coolly, ‘And what do you feel like doing now?’

We have broken the ice, and we have broken it hard! Infinite possibilities! I evaluate my options:

1.     Go back home and play a game

2.     Go home and study

3.     Go home, watch movie

4.     Go home at all

5.     Stay here

6.     And do what? Lets see how this conversation goes, obviously no one else is around

She’s looking at me as I think. I have more confidence now. I pass a smile and she grins back. I get up, walk halfway across the hall still staring hard at her and close the drapes. Then I go sit next to her.

I’m wearing a gray t-shirt and a blue jeans. She’s wearing a white shirt and a beige mini.

I put my hand on her knee and move it slowly up to her thigh. She lets out a slight sigh, but doesn’t remove my hand. So...

PS: If you're still reading this, that was your cue to using your own imagination, geez!! Sucker!

PPS: I didnt write my goan fantasy cuz I'm hoping it will happen soon. Fingers crossed!! 

Buy 1 get 1 Free...

Our eyes met in Paris and my mind was occupied all through Barcelona. I was there and yet not there. I have had this feeling before. It was summer time and we met in a mall. But I got over it pretty easy. This one was taking a toll on me. So I finally decided to do something about it. I went to my friend VJ and asked her, "Can we please check out the H&M store in Barcelona and buy the LBD?"

I am sure there are many like me whose favourite season is the SALE season and who use Jabong.com more often than Google.com. Shopping is like chocolate : helps cheer up your mood and super addictive. What the I-don't-like-shopping type people don't understand is that shopping is very healthy. You invest in something, you walk around the mall or streets which works like an evening walk and the poor shopkeepers gain money to feed their families. The best part about it is you don't gain weight (If only I had discovered this right after my breakup in 1st year of engineering college).

My love for shopping is just 4 years old and applies to shoes, bags and ofcourse clothes. It started in Goa where I did not have my mom around me to say "no" to the stuff I wanted to buy. Thus, my two bags became three when I returned. And the story has continued to Mumbai and Gurgaon.

As the situation now stands, my piles are tall and my closets full but my greed to buy, shop and purchase is still not out of stock. Sale turns me on more than pornographic displays of love. But I don't think I am a shopaholic and thus, am seeking no help.

P.S. - I may require help paying back my credit card bills though.

P.P.S. - If your inquisitive mind is still stuck on pornographic displays of love, I have only one thing to tell you, "Stay tuned!"

Courtship And The Lady In Red

My rusty red Pulsar has had many suitors in its 11 yrs of existence.

Its first owner,  Jolly, drove it while he was in college, and as is his nature, moved on to the next big thing ( a sedan) immediately after. Post which, he literally donated it to me, his destitute brother.

It was actually more of a coup than a handover, because my dad won't let me drive it, and would say "U manage with the Bajaj Chetak", thus hurting my ego and making me feel insignificant. So one day I took it out for a spin- To my college 13 kms away. This little maoist style rebellion, it seems, was my initiation rite because since then my ownership of the bike has been unquestioned (even though the paperwork still says Jolly)

Then when I went to Bangalore, I could identify a need for the bike- It would give girls some respite from the unforgiving Bangalorean traffic. But as they chose a difficult life for themselves, that never happened.

Instead my dear friend Devarshi adorned the pillion seat for the best part of two years. And what times they were!

From the daily breakfast at the idliwala uncle, to stopping highway traffic for a matchbox, this bike has  accompanied us everywhere.

When I left bangalore it stayed with dev for a while and then was brought back to bombay, where it hibernated for about an year. After which it again accompanied me to work for a brief while. Then, obviously, mba happened.

Here the ownership was more or less divided the whole wing. Anybody and everybody could take her as long as they filled some petrol. Talk about pimping your ride, eh?

But mostly it was used by Daya to take around girls, where its calling to bangalore was finally satisfied.

It was shunned by many as old and rusty and not worthy of clinging on to. And for a while I did consider selling it, but one thing became certain. It will be retained for long.. not for practicality, but only for nostalgia.

Ps: Of late, she has found a new companion-a miss! This miss decided the pillion was not so comfortable after all, so why not move to the drivers seat. My lady in red is still not very comfortable with the new touch but is learning fast and adjusting like she always does!

To start with...

Do you know what happens when your college, which has kept you busy for two years, suddenly gets over and you are supposed to be home doing nothing? This happens. My friend Harpreet and me have decided to share our experiences with each other and everyone. Anything on Earth can practically be a topic on this blog. But the twist in the story is that the topics are not self chosen but are given to each other. In other words, expect some spicy content flowing in at SEVERAL occasions. Enough on implicit disclosure of content-to-be and more on us.

I am Pooja Agarwal, 24 years, Just MBAed from MDI, Gurgaon. I am born and brought up in Kota, Rajasthan (I know, I know you all engineers either have been here or atleast know this place). I did mechanical engineering from BITS Pilani and immediately afterwards joined MDI.

My friend Harpreet Singh Gill, 26 years, Just MBAed from MDI, Gurgaon. He is from Mumbai and like all Mumbaikars calls it Bombay. He did his engineering in electronics and communication from RAIT, Mumbai. He worked with Mindtree, iLogo and  before joining MDI.

Now, you curious and filmy heads must be thinking that a guy and a girl from same college writing blog together has to have some more masala to it. Ofcourse there is!